Active listening goes beyond being a necessity for leadership. While it is important for all of us to become active listeners if we want to be good leaders, it is also important for us to become active listeners if we want to be good friends, siblings, sons or daughters, boyfriends or girlfriends, and so on. We can use our own personal examples to validate this point.
As we make our way through the obstacles of life, we will all hit rough patches. We will suffer mistakes, headaches, and heartbreaks. We will search for every means of strength to make it through the tough times. I went through tough times in August when I split up with my girlfriend of 3 years. I was not ready for the relationship to end and didn't know what to do with myself. I didn't eat, I didn't sleep, and worst of all, I gave up on everything I had going. My grades slipped, and I was not fun to hang out with. It was the listening of other people that got me through the tough times.
I was able to talk to my mom and sisters about the things I felt, and know that they were listening with empathy and advice. It was that fact alone that made me realize, I might be okay without my ex-girlfriend and ex-best friend. It is from this that I realized, if I want to truly show my respect and care for somebody else, I need to be able to lend an ear.
This same thing resonates with every leader. Leaders need to be able to listen and understand what their subordinates have to say or feel. If leaders can show that they listen and empathize with their followers, trust will be easier to build than a Legos set.
Monday, March 30, 2009
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Back to Reality...
Oh how nice it was to be in California for a week. It was a complete buzz kill to come back to school and read all of the CSR 309 emails...However, it is time to talk leadership.
After the lecture on company culture, and the leadership involved in making sure everybody understands what is expected of them, I started thinking about my dad's company that he works for. I have never seen a person put so much into his job, and constantly be stressed by it. What makes it frustrating is the person in charge. The President of the company has no clear cut direction in which he wants to go, and has no idea of how he wants to operate. I worked for the business for 3 summers and it was evident that nobody knows exactly what their part is in the operation. The company has only stayed afloat because of the standards set by the previous 2 Presidents.
Thinking of all of these things made me realize that in order to lead any group at all, one must be completely on top of their game. They need to be putting 100% effort into 100% of what they are doing, 100% of the time. A leader must have a clear vision and direction, understand and communicate exactly how and why they are headed that way, and constantly perform maintenance on those expectations.
Thus, I say this to leaders.... NOTHING LESS THAN 100%
M.R.D.
After the lecture on company culture, and the leadership involved in making sure everybody understands what is expected of them, I started thinking about my dad's company that he works for. I have never seen a person put so much into his job, and constantly be stressed by it. What makes it frustrating is the person in charge. The President of the company has no clear cut direction in which he wants to go, and has no idea of how he wants to operate. I worked for the business for 3 summers and it was evident that nobody knows exactly what their part is in the operation. The company has only stayed afloat because of the standards set by the previous 2 Presidents.
Thinking of all of these things made me realize that in order to lead any group at all, one must be completely on top of their game. They need to be putting 100% effort into 100% of what they are doing, 100% of the time. A leader must have a clear vision and direction, understand and communicate exactly how and why they are headed that way, and constantly perform maintenance on those expectations.
Thus, I say this to leaders.... NOTHING LESS THAN 100%
M.R.D.
Thursday, March 5, 2009
Back in Action!
Well all of my loyal followers, it has been a little while since I have posted anything. Unfortunately, I was at home for the last week after my grandmother passed away. It was a very tough time.
However, I am back and ready to blog.
I wanted to write about the exercise we did where we had to imagine what would be said about us at our own funeral. It was funny to me because I have already thought about this a little while ago. I was reading the 7 Habits book by Covey and saw this same exercise in that book. At that same time, I was going through a very difficult situation with a girlfriend of 3 years.
To make a long story short, I was pretty stupid in the relationship and hurt her pretty bad. We broke up and I realized how dumb I was and it was too late. So I was bearing the feeling of letting her down, letting her family down, and letting my family down. Then I read that exercise.....
I pictured my funeral, and thought about the things that people would say about me. It hit me that the most important people to me would not be saying what I would hope. That was an earth shattering experience. From that day forward I made it a mission to live my life in a manner that people would respect and admire. That means being a trustworthy person. That means being the hardest worker in anything I try. That means being there for people no matter what. That means growing up and acting like a man.
So to those of you who are reading this, and would even attend my funeral, I hope I am giving you something good to talk about.
However, I am back and ready to blog.
I wanted to write about the exercise we did where we had to imagine what would be said about us at our own funeral. It was funny to me because I have already thought about this a little while ago. I was reading the 7 Habits book by Covey and saw this same exercise in that book. At that same time, I was going through a very difficult situation with a girlfriend of 3 years.
To make a long story short, I was pretty stupid in the relationship and hurt her pretty bad. We broke up and I realized how dumb I was and it was too late. So I was bearing the feeling of letting her down, letting her family down, and letting my family down. Then I read that exercise.....
I pictured my funeral, and thought about the things that people would say about me. It hit me that the most important people to me would not be saying what I would hope. That was an earth shattering experience. From that day forward I made it a mission to live my life in a manner that people would respect and admire. That means being a trustworthy person. That means being the hardest worker in anything I try. That means being there for people no matter what. That means growing up and acting like a man.
So to those of you who are reading this, and would even attend my funeral, I hope I am giving you something good to talk about.
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